I’ve been asked post about how to avoid passive voice when writing. I had to do some research myself to make sure I had a good grasp on the concept and to have some solid tips to pass along to you. Please make sure you notice the sources at the bottom of the page, I want to make sure they get their acknowledgement.
First, let me explain the difference between passive and active voice. The passive voice is generally vague, sterile, and clinical in nature. It’s used for people who aren’t important or unknown in a story. Since it’s non-specific and generic, passive voice is often used to deliver facts or bad news.
The package was delivered by the mailman.
Many workers were terminated and given severance checks.
Active voice is used with details, explanations, and personality. It’s clear and concise, and gives the reader better insight of the characters and settings.
Your entire piece of work doesn’t have to be one or the other. In fact, mixing between the two will keep things exciting and will prevent the reader from getting bored or overwhelmed. If you’re unsure how to do that, a good rule of thumb would be to use active voice with main characters and passive voice with minor characters.
A lot of writers get involved with putting out details, getting the story out of their heads, and writing a project can happen fast. Sometimes this can translate into overuse of the passive voice. If you’re unsure if you’ve abused passive writing, here are some ways to read through your piece and find those sentences.
The example sentence will be: “The car was driven by Janet.”
- The subject is not doing the activity. The subject is being acted upon. (Car is subject, Janet is the doer)
- A form of “be” (am, is, were, are, was) is used with the past participle. (was driven in the example)
- The phrase “by [person/thing]” is in the sentence or can be added to the sentence. (by Janet)
Now that you know how to identify those sentences, here are some ways to change your passive voice into active voice.
- Remove “ing” words. Change was walking into walked, had eaten to ate, or were playing into played.
- Choose different verbs. Use more exciting verbs to explain something that’s happening. Using the thesaurus has become frowned upon, and many people feel like it can make a piece sound overworked, but I encourage using this tool if you’re feeling stale or uninspired. For example, change walk to strut, slink, glide, etc.
- Put the adjectives before the nouns, not after. For example, a passive sentence is: The man was tall and stoic, hoping he’d get his point across. Active would be: The tall and stoic man hoped his point came across clearly.
- Change the order of your sentences. For example: From The symphony piece was written by Mindy Smith. to Mindy Smith wrote the symphony piece.
- Make the subject do the action. The example above “The car was driven by Janet.” would be changed to “Janet drove the car.”
The best part about this is that the changes are simple. The English language and rules are fluid and flexible. The structure and wording can mean the difference between a scientific journal and the best sci-fi novel you’ve ever read. So read through your projects, see if you can spice it up, switch it up, and activate your active voice!
Please feel free to contact me if you have questions or need help. Leave sentences you’re unsure about in the comments and we’ll break them down for you.
I’m also looking for ideas for blog posts. If you have something that is confusing you, something that you’d be interested in hearing about, or just an interesting topic for me to tackle (doesn’t have to be editor/writing related either!), please drop it in the comments and I would love to attack all of it!!
Warmest regards,
The Editor
SOURCES:
- www.nailthatpaper.com
- The Copyeditor’s Handbook, Third Edition
- San José State University Writing Center